Things My  Mother Taught me ....    Remember any of these?  lol

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE . 'If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.


'

2. My mother taught me RELIGION .



'You better pray that will come out of the carpet.


'

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL .



'If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!'

4. My mother taught me LOGIC .



' Because I said so, that's why.


'

5 . My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .



'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me.


'

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT .



'Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in a n accident.


'

7.


My mother taught me IRONY
'Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about.


'

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .



'Shut your mouth and eat your supper.


'

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM .



'Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!'

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA .



'You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.


'

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER .



'This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.


'

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY .



'If I told you once, I've told you a million times.


Don't exaggerate!'

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE .



'I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.


'

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .



'Stop acting like your father!'

15. My mother taught me about ENVY .



'There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do.


'

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .



'Just wait until we get home.


'

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING .



'You are going to get it when you get home!'

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE .



'If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.


'

19. My mother taught me ESP .



'Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?'

20. My mother taught me HUMOR .



'When that lawn mower cuts off your foot, don't come running to me.


'

21.. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .



'If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.


'

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.



'You're just like your father.


'

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS .



'Shut that door behind you.


Do you think you were born in a barn?'

24. My mother taught me WISDOM .



'When you get to be my age, you'll understand.


'

25.


And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE
'One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you.


'

Did any of these sound familiar?