11 years ago I made my first attempt at escaping the State of Michigan for a warmer climate.  Don’t get me wrong, I liked the state.  Sports, culture, educational opportunities……another country right across the river, beautiful northern Michigan and all that water!!!!I

The only reason I wanted to go was that I had become a weenie when it came to cold weather.  I wasn’t always like that.  But be the time I hit the big 3-0, in my opinion, the only way one could enjoy the snow was indoors, next to a blazing fire with a drink in one’s hand! 

Unfortunately, I had to go out.

A friend of mine had moved to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina….I visited a couple times, fell in love with beach and the golf and the weather, and decided to join her there.

I set up some job interviews, put most of my things in storage, packed up my doggies and me and on the morning of 9/10/2001, the three of us headed south.

I made it as far as Charleston, West Virginia on 9/10 and checked into a hotel for the night.  Buddy, Clark, and me (Buddy and Clark were my two Lhasa’s) would travel the rest of the way after some sleep.

On the morning of 9/11, it was kinda foggy in the hills of WV and I decided to wait until it lifted before setting out.  I got some coffee and donuts, sat in the bed in my room and turned on the Today Show to wait out the fog.

There was no way on the world that I could anticipate and/or prepare myself for what I was about to see.

Flight 11 had already slammed into the North Tower and the screen behind Matt [Lauer] showed the massive amounts of smoke pouring from the severely damaged building.  Then, as I watched and listened to Matt babble on about how much he didn’t know….Flight 175 crashed onto the South Tower creating a massive fireball on the screen right behind him.  I still shake and get a chill when I see replays of that video.....11 years later.

Of course, the rest is history.

And I asked myself that damn one-word question that I seem to ask myself more frequently as I get older…….WHY?

All that death……WHY?

Fanatics will tell you that what we saw was God’s Will in action.  But the overwhelming majority of people, including people of Arabic descent, know that nothing is further from the truth.  And whether or not you believe in God and Satan is irrelevant.  You have to believe in Evil. 

We saw it in all its horror on 9/11/2001.

And evil is still around.  There are still people that want to kill us.  And if you think Homeland Security and that TSA have it under control….think again  I fly a lot! And although I’m ashamed of it…I have a recurring thought every time I see someone of Arabic descent boarding my plane…..”This the one???”

But I still fly, ‘cuz if I don’t the a**holes win.

But that discussion is for another time and place,

Today…..

God Bless those who died in the attack;

God Bless their families who suffered such a loss, so unnecessarily; and

God bless us all.

All of this relationship talk flying around recently reminded me of an article I read, not long ago.  I don’t recall the title or where I saw it, but I do recall that it made a lot of sense so I’ll share the substance of it.

I was directed at women and it spoke about risks a woman should take to enhance their relationship. 

There are three:

1.     Spend time apart – Makes sense…..right?  Day in, day out, morning, noon and night, including weekends will get old…..sooner or later.  We’re not talking minutes or even hours.  We’re talking days.

2.    Have a boyfriend/ manfriend/girlfriend…whatever your preference - Not an affair but simply a friend of the gender to whom you’d normally be sexually attracted.  Have lunch, have dinner, coffee, a couple drinks, whatever.  That way you’ll have a friend other than a friend of the gender to whom you’d normally not be sexually attracted to, to share ‘stuff’ with, tell you how good you look, etc., when the husband, partner or SO is unavailable…physically, emotionally, psychologically or if there’s a game on TV.

3.    Have (and presumably use) a vibrator – Pretty self-explanatory….don’t ya think?  Just be sure to have plenty of batteries around and don’t buy them at the Dollar Store!

Obviously, all risk taking requires that one exercise care. Too much time apart and you may forget his/her name. The probably of this issue arising increases with age.  Relative to #2, be sure not to get toooo close.  And with #3, too many trysts with the vibrator and you may find that it’s the only thing that satisfies you and you’ll be cooking it dinner……with candles.

An added feature if this relationship approach is that it can be adapted for use by men.  Time apart is gender non-specific and #2 is easily modified for male use, regardless of preference, as long as they take  care to ensure that they’re not  hittin’ it. #3, of course isn’t necessary.   Men already have all that they need…. They’re self-contained orgasm units.  It appears that they may be more adapted to lengthy periods of little or no sexual activity (although some women will argue that they can do the job just as well as men…. without ‘tools’).

Let me share something else…….it works!  I’ve been living with a significant other for almost 10 years. That’s much longer than any other ‘live together’ type relationship has ever lasted for me.   The relationship is unique in that it’s relatively asexual.  But we are very intimate in other ways, love spending time together and we laugh (I mean really laugh) every day. 

But, (#1) I travel all the time for work and I’m only home two or three weekends a month plus a week or two here and there.  (#2)  She has a man friend (just one…..I think) and (#3) a vibrator (one….I think, although she used to have more) and she’s happier than a 'pig in shit'.  So am I.  The only difference is that my #2s are scattered over several states.

The crazy thing is we had all three in place years before the article came out.  Hell, we could have written it.

So just remember ladies, all you need to make the relationship work is to roll the dice three times…….spend time apart, have a pinch hitter for the mate (or prospective mate) and have (and use) a vibrator (more than one is OK but be careful about playing favorites…If you get too close to one, it may affect your primary relationship).

And don’t forget the batteries!

I really want to thank those who responded to my webcam post from last week with instructions and advice. It helped me sooo much!!! I do believe I’m ready to ‘go live’. I’m still a little apprehensive, but if past experience is any indication, the apprehension will soon turn to excitement.

Clearly, anyone who’s seen my photo gallery knows that me and a camera are not strangers. I think my difficulty is caused by the fact that when I post still shots….I see ‘em first.

But, as I believe ‘confidence is sexy’, it’s time to be ‘walking the walk’ and not just ‘talking the talk’.

If it’s interesting, I’ll post on how it went. I have to believe that there’s at least a few others who, like me, are dying to get in the game but scared of that little cam icon.

Thanks to all again for the guidance!

And by the way Bushbumper, I’m still waiting for that account number.

OK…..this is for all of the cam users.  Also, and maybe even more important, for the cam watchers.  What brought this up was a blog post by another member a week or so ago regarding cam use. It got me thinking (probably too much) and I promised myself that I’d find the answers to my questions.

I have to admit, whenever I I’m in a chat room and see the reference to turning a cam on, or see the little cam icon, I get a little envious.  You see, I’m comfortable around both still and video cameras, with or without clothes.  Also, I do think I’m a bit of an exhibitionist.  And, I have both the internal webcam on my laptop and an external cam with about 6 feet of cable. 

But the thought of going ‘live’ scares me to death!

Imagine that…..an exhibitionist afraid of a camera?  That’s like being an airline pilot who’s scared of heights.  Not too many around.

I think my concern is that I don’t know ‘cam etiquette’.

Sooo, I have questions, and I know all you users and watchers will have all the answers.  So let’s get started.

First the basics:

#1 When I turn my cam on, am I automatically seen by everybody?

You may say, “Well, just turn it on and see.”  That’s the problem!  I’m afraid to turn it on.

#2 When the cam is on, is it ‘Showtime’?

I’m not all that thrilled about having to put on a live show every time I flip the ‘on’ switch.  I’m certainly not ruling it out.  That’s one of the options I hope to have at some point.  But not always, and certainly, not for everybody.  Which brings me to #3.

#3 Do I control who sees me?  And, do I know who’s looking?

You’d think an exhibitionist like me would want the largest audience possible.  Normally that’s true but I like to control who sees what.  For example, certain pics that work well here at Sexy Ads, won’t work in a church paper.  I’d like to gear the appearance to the audience.  Which gets me to #4.

#4 What should I be wearing when I turn the cam on?

Dressed for work, robe and slippers, bra and panties, no top, no bottom, what is the ‘webcam dress code’?  'If I can change the audience (#3), I may want to change what I’m wearing.  But I'd like to know what to wear when I start.

If I can get through these issues, I think I’d be ready to give the cam a try.

Now the watchers.

#1 What is it you’re looking for?  

This whole experience has got to be good for everybody if we’re all going to have fun with it.  And, I know that not everyone is looking for a ‘live sex show’.  Expectations mean a lot and If I know the expectations, I may be able to meet them.  Help!

I’m probably much more concerned about this than I need to be.  I do believe that once I start, I’m really going to like it.  But right now, I’m pretty much paralyzed.  That’s very unusual because I’ll try just about anything……at least once.  After all, I named my boat 'Cuz I Can!

Any suggestions will be greatly appreciated.  I really want to turn this thing on.

Besides, it’s too late to take it back and I can’t find the receipt.