shanniepie
Female, 40   USA
Female
Oxnard
California, USA
274 mi from you
40
Married/Attached
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Cowboy UP...Cowgirl down ;)
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Tickle me!
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5' 6"
Average
Caucasian
Straight
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14 hrs ago
Vote for me
These enhanced profiles will give you a much better insight into shanniepie's lifestyle, desires, fantasies and more. Click on any of the links to open a new window and view shanniepie's answers to questions on the following topics...
I am the one you dream of....
Women seeking penpals
Just kidding! I am just a goofball:)If I tickled you it DOESNT mean that I want to fuck or even meet!It simply means that I came across your picture/profile and I found it to be interesting, entertaining or well written. Unfortunately there isn't a feature that allows to send a kudos... nice smile or hilarious ad for free.. so I will simply tickle you. I am not seeking anything from this site except laughs in the chat room. I don't care how large a cock you have or how well you can use it cause I am sure my vibrator would beat you every day of the week and twice on Sundays!Stop by bedroom chat and say Hi! I may even christen you with my cyber hulkinator vibrator :)All kidding aside... I am only here to chat with old friends. I have been a member at this site for about 8 years now and was lucky enough to meet the love of my life through this site almost 7 years ago. We are NOT swingers... we do not meet or hook up with anyone.. EVER... so don't bother asking and thinking that you can tempt me. I am 100% faithful and monongamous to my sweetheart and nothing or no one would or could ever change that:)

I do wish everyone that frequents this site the best of luck in whatever it is they seek. The owners, Jayce and Maureen, are very helpful and dedicated to this site and making sure that you have the best possible experience. They are the nicest people and will assist you if you are in need of advice or help navigating this site. Personally.... I will be forever grateful to the owners because without them and their site.. I would never would have found the love of my life or lead a life full of happiness, mutual respect, love and .... AWESOMELY AMAZING SEX.. for almost 7 yrs now:)

This site does work.... so don't lose faith!:)Best of luck..... Shanniepie
Looking for a Tasty Lollipop....
Women seeking Fetishes
How many licks will it take to get to the center of your tootsie pop?Let's find out....1,2...**Crunch**!Sorry:)

I have an interesting fetish for the weird and unusual....I am intrigued with cattle branding irons and would love to singe my name across a tight ass .I am into chickens and become highly aroused not just by the feathers,but the WHOLE DAMN CHICKEN,if you catch my drift!

I look forward to hearing from you....I need to run now as Colonel Sanders is on the phone for me :)
Remember that an ad ....
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The insane ,comical and sometimes erotic musings of ME ;)
Insane? Comical? Erotic? Take your pick- it's all me wrapped into one blog ;)
This blog is currently rated 4.5 out of 5
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The Winner of Shanniepies NUDES and VIP is...
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Gotcha! Had to get you lil' perverts to stop and read my blog, right?

I am pleased and honored to announce the winners...YES, WINNERS of my Officer Shanniepie Essay contest.! It was a daunting task. A MASSIVE undertaking to weed through entries and give each and every  entry my  personal and thorough attention.

The erotic tales. The comedic tales. I tell ya' - the last time I was THAT turned on was when Jayce was sitting in my living room going on and on for what seemed like hours about doohickies and thingamabobbies in his sexy Aussie accent!

I would like  to thank each and every participant equally for taking the time and energy to put creativity and imagination to keyboard and come up with some amazing writings! I wish I could give you ALL a one month VIP membership for your hard work and creativity, but unfortunately I cannot. 

Instead...those that did NOT win my Officer Shanniepies Essay Contest need not feel all their HARD work and efforts have been in vain. I am awarding you ALL a second place prize......one night in a cheap motel in the seediest part of town with...MrMoonie! That's right folks!  Who says being the 1st place winner is the only way to go? Imagine MrMoonie at your beckon call...to do with as you will....! I assure you, ya'll won't be dissapointed! If you are.....please read the fine print here..." Shanniepie is NOT responsible for any bodily or mental injury incurred whilst said NON 1st PLACE winner is redeeming their prize of a night of the unimaginable with MrMoonie.Any and all perverted and sick shit that may ...or may not occur during the claiming of this prize is the sole responsibility of the "Non 1st place winner" and as such , Shanniepie nor Sexyads(Mom and Dad) may be held responsible. In the event that MrMoonie impregnates said NON 1st place winner- MrJaxiepoopoo shall be solely responsible for any and all medical expenses and child support owed".
 
Being that my attention span is about as long as MrJaxies penis or the length of MrMoonies lovemaking sessions...I was unable to decide on JUST ONE WINNER...soo....I have chosen 2 WINNERS and Mommy Maureen and Daddy Jayce have tossed in a 1mth free VIP membership for the 2nd winner! (Who says' Mom and Dad don't give away stuff for FREE- stick that in your asses all you moaners, whiners and bitchers! ;) )

And now.....**Drum roll** please.....without further ado ( yeah, I gotta take a PEE break!)......I am happy to announce the WINNERS  of  a 1 month FREE...FREE VIP membership... ....which will allow them to SEE " WHO HAS VIEWED ME" ,ENLARGE  pics to FULL SIZE...and basically perv anyone and EVERYONE  (cept ME, cause I will blacklist them as fast as Loverman does!)...contact ANYONE and EVERYONE their lil' hearts desire.......**Drum roll louder**......

Announcing...SEXYADS newest and soon to be most viewed VIPers.....Desert from Desert from desertNmoon and........dv8(fuck me I for the life of me can't recall the rest of her nick since I never call her by it!LOL!)......

Congrats to you sexy winners! May your eyesight stay intact  and your blue balls finally pinken with this VIP membership :)Enjoy ya'll...ya' earned it!!

Special thanks to entries by Liz, PhoenixFyre, Jason, Nurse34DD4U and of course...our beloved and soon to be going to hell on the express line...MrMoonie!
Posted at 12:05am (MST) | Comments (5) | Add Comment | Report Post
ShanniePie NAKED!!
Sunday, October 25, 2009

I KNEW that would get you lil' pervs attention!  Now that I have your attention, I would like to take this opportunity to discuss all of the recent changes that have been made to our beloved site(Duh, it's SexyAds!).

I have seen many members over the past day or so writing blogs about the recent changes made that impact NON PAYING members and their ability to view who has viewed them. Now, I know this might come as a shock to some of you, but guess what? This site costs ALOT of money to run! ALOT!  Why should the owners, Jayce and Maureen, have to foot the entire bill and work tirelessly to keep this site up and running just so that non members have everything afforded to them for FREE?

I understand that economic times are tough  people. Do you stop to think that these tough financial times might also be impacting the ability to keep this beloved site up and running ? Do you stop and think that while you are getting ALL the FREE goodies, that SOMEONE has to be paying for them? Guess what!? Maureen and Jayce are paying for them !

Over the 11 years I have been a member here I have voiced my concerns to Mom and Dad about the ability to keep this site up and running. I have told them numerous times I feel they give far too much free features away and if they continued to do so, no one would be willing to PAY for a VIP Membership. Why should they when they get soooo much for free already!?

For Mom and Dad, it's not JUST about making a buck. They have a genuine interest in each and every members well being .They care about their members and like to get to know them all on a personal level. They give tips, fix problems and are there when you need them most. They do this because they are genuinely nice people, not just because they want your money.

They have always taken an active role in every aspect of this site. You will see them in the chatrooms, in the forums and even commenting on YOUR profile or photos. Where else can you get that kind of interaction with site owners? If you catch them in chat, they will engage you in conversation. They will laugh with you and sometimes, they will cry with you. They go out of their way to make everyone at this site feel important, loved and welcomed. Where else are you going to get this ?

That being said, for those of you that are whining, bitching and complaining that Mom and Dad are taking away your free features.....GET THE FUCK OVER IT!  I understand...we ALL understand the financial hardships being dealt to everyone at this moment in time. Honestly though, do you think that your lack of income is more important than the next guys? Do you not stop and think that Mom and Dad need to make a living also? This is NOT a partime job for them ya' know! This IS their livelyhood! It's NOT a HOBBY! It's their sole source of income! Do you not realize that SexyAds USE to have a fairly good sized staff to help run this site? Do you not realize that they had to be laid off , so that the owners could still afford to keep this beloved site up and running? Do you not realize that Maureen and Jayce soley run every aspect of this site now themselves? Never getting a single day off from work. No vacation. No break.No sick day. They are IT! If they don't run the site, it crumbles and fades into the Internet abyss. Who wants that to happen?

I am pissed beyond belief that there are actually people putting them down for doing what we are ALL trying to do! Make a living in this world- hopefully doing something that means something to us and that we love.How dare anyone complain that your "rights" to see "who viewed you" were taken away!  If you are so interested in seeing who has viewed you, suck it up and buy a damn VIP membership! I am guessing that most of you complainers won't do it though, as it seems you are only happy when you have something to bitch about anyway!

Do you people not understand the costs involved to keep a site like this up and running? Do you not understand that they have kept this site going for so many years without advertising that  is basically spam.Do you not enjoy logging into SexyAds and knowing that you will be greeted with open arms and able to express yourselves in a friendly ,yet sexy atmosphere without fear of judgement?

I wish all you complainers would stop to think of someone other than yourselves for a moment. It's really NOT ALL ABOUT YOU! If you want to find love...or the best fuck of your life- why shouldn't YOU be the one paying for the chance to do so? Why should all of that financial burden fall onto the shoulders of Maureen and Jayce? It shouldn't! EVER!

NOTHING in this life is FREE! I feel Mom and Dad have been far too nice for far too long , at the detriment of their own pocketbook and I personally am glad to see that for once they are looking out for their own best interest. None of you complainers are looking out for them nor for anyone else. You are only interested in what you can get and get for free for yourselves.Shame on you!

Now, that being said. How's about all you damn whiners, bitchers and complainers get off your pity pots and EARN a VIP membership?! I have been running/advertising a VIP membership essay contest for the past few weeks. I was willing to help out my fellow SexyAds members by raffling off my prize in last months uniform contest...a 1 month VIP membership. I wanted to "give back" and since I do not need my prize, figured it would be nice to help someone out that might want to be a VIP for a month(yeah, I do now how to plug myself don't I?LOL).

So.....all you financially broke  and  cheap mo' fo's stop yer bitchin' and ENTER my CONTEST!! If you don't....then you have no one to blame except yourself.Right? Like I said...nothing in life is free, but if you put for some energy into something other than bitching....ya' just might be a VIP member .



Posted at 7:29pm (MST) | Comments (12) | Add Comment | Report Post
Shanniepies VIP Essay Contest Extended!
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Hey Guys, Dolls and Deviants!

I am extending the chance for one of you lucky ducks to win my 1Mth. VIP Membership!! That's RIGHT!!! Two  more weeks to get in your creative, imaginative, erotic or downright funny essays featuring Officer Shanniepie !!

I have already accepted a few entries and have them posted in my previous blog. Take a  looksie and read some truly erotic and downright HILARIOUS entries! There is something for everyone! Whether you are aroused by some hot, girl on girl action....true life stories.....sub/domme scenarios or just downright insane comical workings- you will NOT be disappointed!!

Many thanks to MrMoonie for  his amazing and INSANE , creative photo-collaging! Also honorable mentions and nipple tweaks out to : PhoenixFyre, LizDrivesATruck, Mistress Petra and Nurse34D4U for your sexy and erotic entries! You gals rock!
Extra special mention to Jason for his hysterically funny Rookie Fuktard Force entry!  Take the time to read it! It had me ROFLMAO...I swear!

Please submit entries to me ASAP in the form of an email or place directly into my previous blog announcing this contest.
Hurry up folks...time is a wasting!! You don't want this free offer to pass you by- do ya'? ;)
Posted at 10:58pm (MST) | No Comments (0) | Add Comment | Report Post
Enter To Win Shannipies VIP Membership!
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Good evening my fellow SexyAds members! I would like to thank everyone who voted for me in the latest Uniform contest. It was a pleasant and unexpected surprise to win the latest contest ( I swear, I was shocked! No shit!).

I never entered with intentions of winning and only do so for shits N giggles and....so Mommy Maureen and Daddy Jayce don't yell at me for not setting an example and encouraging others to enter!

Apparently, my prize for loving to dress up like a slutty cop( that even a convicted felon in violation of his parole would love being arrested by!) has garnered me a coveted VIP membership for a month. Fortunately for some lucky SOB- I am NOT in need of this prize as I am already a  SexyAds VIP lifer.....sooooo.....I am offering up my coveted prize to ONE...yes ONE lucky winner of Shanniepies Essay Contest!!

That's right folks! I am going to be giving away my 1 month VIP all access membership to one of you lucky bastards that are smart enough, witty enough, creative enough, imaginative enough to catch my eye with your essay! Just think....for ONE SOLID month you can browse and perv your way through unlimited NUDE PHOTOS!! You can email all those hot,sexy men and women you have longed to contact, but were not able to due to the fact that neither of you are VIPs!

The winner of Shanniepies Essay Contest will have UNLIMITED  access to... MY PERSONAL GALLERY OF NUDE AND EROTIC- OK downright XXX PHOTOS and VIDEOS! Gotcha! Keep dreamin'! However, you WILL be able to view all of Michelle36D's videos ( let me warn ya' you will sooo wish you were a loofah!) and a myriad of others sexy, naughty photos and videos!

To enter my contest for 1 Month FREE -UNLIMITED ACCESS VIP Membership at SexyAds- simply do the following:

1)Do some mental and finger exercises. This contest is NOT for the weak! It will require LOADS of STAMINA on the contestants part.Limber up those typing digits, because I expect..NO, DEMAND that your essay be of a relatively decent LENGTH to catch my attention!

2) Either email me your essay or simply write it directly here under a comment in this blog.It's THAT simple! I will NOT be grading you on spelling and correct grammar- adjectives,nouns, pronouns,verbs-don't need to go totally out the window though! I can forgive bad spelling, as long as you attempt to be creative and imaginative :)

3) Your essay MUST be related to my winning COP PIC!  That's right! I get to call the shops here- I wear the badge and wear it well! Your essay can be comical, serious, fictional , non fictional or erotic.As long as it includes YOURS TRULY as the main subject......ya' know! " The day I was arrested by Officer Shanniepie"....


Remember people- I RARELY get offended! You can write pretty much anything you desire regarding Officer Shanniepie and  yourself as the "felon" ....your long ride up to the big house or how it felt when you dropped the soap in the shower the first time! 


I will be running this contest for 1 week! So, get those creative juices flowing people! Show me what ya' got!  Make me laugh, turn me on....or I will toss you in jail! :)


**PS- Maureen and Jayce have allowed me to give away my VIP membership in this fashion and have actually encouraged me to think up some wild, wacky, devious way to do so.Any questions on the validity of this contest can be answered directly by them**
Posted at 9:35pm (MST) | Comments (28) | Add Comment | Report Post
A Night in the Life of Officer Shanniepie (3)
Monday, November 24, 2008

..."We're looking for two sexual deviants new to Oxnard.Go by the names of MisterJax and MrMoon- ya' heard of 'em girls?", inquired Knight.

Running her dildo action nightstick up the length of each of the ...whores bodies,, she lingered momentarily at their most prized possessions. " I know it's a jungle out there girls, but don't you think THIS is a little too literal? Invest in a weedwacker or some Nair!".

The stench of the sexual cesspool was overwhelming to the officers senses.Cooking oil, vegemite and plastic .The mingled smells hit them like a ton of bricks. Their heads swimming, their stomachs churning with the overwhelming urge to vomit. "Great", Shannie mumbled as she stabled herself against a massive ,wooden rack.

Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed him. She had just seen his photo at todays briefing. It was just whom she was looking for! "Mister Jax! Nice diaper there softie!"

Unable to reply with a ballgag firmly in place in his mouth, his eyes diverted to his leather clad mistress. Standing 4 foot nothing in 6 inch stillettos she was a sight to behold.Tits on a stick you could call her. Her name, Mom Maureen. Proprieter of Moms and Pops House Of Flesh.

"Shannie, look to the left!", Knight yelled from across the room.

The room was dimly lit. She strained past a room chalked full of every kind of sexual perversion and deviant imaginable. Everyone in various stages of undress.Most nude and all partaking in some bit of fetish of the flesh.

Her eyes momentarily locked on Bushbumper, scantilly clad in her Snow White costume."Man, I really need to stop inviting that closet crossdresser over for dinner!", she thought to herself. Shaking her head a few hundred times in utter shock, she tried to banish the vision before her from her psyche.

"Holy HELL!This must be King Daddy Dom Jayce we have here Knight!", she stated matter of factly.

Perched high atop a 24 K gold commode he sat there.Surrounded by laptops, widgets,doohickies and thingamabobbies.Donned in nothing more than a crown of Dildos and Cockrings. At his side..his ever trusty Fagman Gr8 and a gimped out MrMoon.

"Dear,Dear Officer Shanniepie! We have been expecting you! Come, kneel before Daddy dear child.", Pop Jayce said with a evil laugh.

"They REALLY need to start paying me hazardous duty pay!!", Shannie mumbled,"This night...is definetely going to be LONG!"......

Posted at 12:03am (MST) | Comments (7) | Add Comment | Report Post
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You have your own smiley?  Really?   

Sheesh woman, what's next the big breasted cowgirl?        LOL!


Added: Thursday, November 19, 2009 2:09am
Dr.Pepper?  Yuck! Dr.Pepper comes in a bottle!
Added: Saturday, November 14, 2009 4:48pm
Wow that is a hard comment back to me, I was just joking. As for your partner in crime we are getting along just fine. And for the other pictures I already have them on my computer. I think she is a big girl and know that I am a good guy.............  Have a great weekend.
Added: Friday, November 13, 2009 7:47pm
Hi, I am Patty new friends in Simi, I like the new pictures you posted of her on her profile, whats up with that? I liked the old ones better.
Added: Wednesday, November 11, 2009 10:17pm
shannie who won the photo contest for holloween??i voted for you three times a day,always a ten ...you are one good looking women.sexy with dignity...you got it all.your man is one lucky guy.....he should be and i'm sure he is proud.you popped into my head one more that one occasion.dont want to say when.what can i say...stay on top...your top shelf
Added: Wednesday, November 11, 2009 3:39pm
Aww, thanks i'm glad i made you hungry :)You're a hottie!!
Added: Tuesday, November 10, 2009 11:56pm
I stopped by and perved you...hope you don't mind.
J
Added: Friday, November 6, 2009 5:53pm
I've vacated your basement and I even put everything back where it belongs... well minus a few souvenirs. thanks for letting me hide out!
Added: Wednesday, November 4, 2009 9:23pm
Thank you Shannie!

Now I'm off to write up the outline for the Officer Shanniepie/KODOS luvfest series, which will also involve a police dog, (for kodos, not you.)



Mwah!

~dv
Added: Wednesday, November 4, 2009 5:07pm

LOL...and Thank you Shann...I know, deep down, you find it hard to verbalise and rationaise your love for me...but that's ok...It's just something I have to live with....
...ahem....yes...anyhoo, where was I?....ah yes, my observation skills are a "curse", from a previous life and a rather differrent career path from many years ago...sometimes I regress...I just can't help it! LOL!

Be safe...Ya Tart!

Gr8XX

Added: Tuesday, November 3, 2009 9:45am
Added: Monday, November 2, 2009 3:55pm

hi shanniepie,
 
wow you kick ass.... you are beautiful 

 

Added: Monday, November 2, 2009 10:43am

Do you actually play that guitar or do you just use it as a manhole cover?

Added: Monday, November 2, 2009 5:13am
"Show Them To Me"
yeah... I was initially gonna paste you in the nun's outfit but then I realized that I'm already in enough trouble with The Man Upstairs!
Added: Sunday, November 1, 2009 6:54pm
I haven't seen you around that forum lately so I thought I'd post you a preview of the high esteem we hold you in.
Added: Tuesday, October 27, 2009 5:55pm
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