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Male, 57 United States
3,448 mi from you
A discreet relationship, Casual sex, A long term relationship, Friends
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Fantasies & Fetishes
Looking for a Lady that knows how to be a Woman.
Men Seeking Women
I am looking for a Lady to have fun with. Some one that can have fun in and out of the bed room. I know there is more to life than sex but life with out sex is no fun. I have thing I would like to do but I don't wont to do them alone. Thanks to all of you lovely lady's for you time and have a great day.
Remember that an ad ....
Just thing I like or need to say.
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Old Lady in Court
Monday, October 18, 2010
when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.
Little Old Lady:
the funniest things in a long time
Friday, October 15, 2010
This has to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for 'Termination without Cause.'
Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'
Hi handsome. My name is Rose
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
> > > Definitely > food for thought!! The first day of school our > professor introduced himself and challenged us to > get to know someone we didn't already know. I > stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched > my shoulder. > >I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old >lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her >entire being.. > >She said, 'Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm >eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?' > >I laughed and enthusiastically responded, 'Of >course you may!' and she gave me a giant squeeze.. > > >'Why are you in college at such a young, innocent >age?' I asked. > >She jokingly replied, 'I'm here to meet a rich >husband, get married, and have a couple of kids...' > > >'No seriously,' I asked. I was curious what may >have motivated her to be taking on this challenge >at her age. > >'I always dreamed of having a college education >and now I'm getting one!' she told me. > >After class we walked to the student union building >and shared a chocolate milkshake. > >We became instant friends. Every day for the >next three months we would leave class together >and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening >to this 'time machine' as she shared her wisdom >and experience with me.. > >Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus >icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. >She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention >bestowed upon her from the other students. She was >living it up. > >At the end of the semester we invited Rose to >speak at our football banquet. I'll never forget >what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped >up to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared >speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the >floor. > >Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned >into the microphone and simply said, 'I'm sorry >I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this >whiskey is killing me! I'll never get my speech >back in order so let me just tell you what I know.' > > >As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, >' We do not stop playing because we are old; we >grow old because we stop playing. > >There are only four secrets to staying young, >being happy, and achieving success. You have to >laugh and find humor every day. You've got to have >a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die. > >We have so many people walking around who are >dead and don't even know it! > >There is a huge difference between growing older >and growing up. > >If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed >for one full year and don't do one productive thing, >you will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven >years old and stay in bed for a year and never do >anything I will turn eighty-eight. > >Anybody! Can grow older. That doesn't take any >talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always >finding opportunity in change. Have no regrets. > > >The elderly usually don't have regrets for what >we did, but rather for things we did not do. The >only people who fear death are those with regrets..' > > >She concluded her speech by courageously singing >'The Rose.' > >She challenged each of us to study the lyrics >and live them out in our daily lives. At the year's >end Rose finished the college degree she had begun >all those months ago. > >One week after graduation Rose died peacefully >in her sleep. > >Over two thousand college students attended her >funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught >by example that it's never too late to be all you >can possibly be. > >When you finish reading this, please send this >peaceful word of advice to your friends and family, >they'll really enjoy it! > >These words have been passed along in loving >memory of ROSE. > >REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING >UP IS OPTIONAL. We make a Living by what we get. >We make a Life by what we give. > >God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage. >If God brings you to it, He will bring you through >it. > >Pass this message on to 7 people . You will receive a miracle tomorrow ( if you don't think so....look > out your window when you wake in the morning and > think about it ) > >If you choose not, then you refuse to bless someone >else. > >'Good friends are like stars..... .....You don't >always see them, but you know they are always there.
Just for you - 1978 - 2010
Sunday, October 10, 2010
This should be sent only to those whose level of maturity qualifies them to relate to it...
1978: Long hair
1978: Parents begging you to get your hair cut
Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly change things. Each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together a list to try to give the faculty a sense of the mindset of this year's incoming freshmen. Here's this year's list:
The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1992.
The CD was introduced 2 years before they were born.
They have always had an answering machine.
They have always had cable.
They cannot fathom not having a remote control..
They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
They never heard: "Where's the Beef?", "I'd walk a mile for a Camel", or "de plane, Boss, de plane.."
They do not care who shot J. R. and have no idea who J. R. even is.
McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
Do you feel old yet? Pass this on to the other old fogies on your list. Notice the larger type, that's for those of you who have trouble reading..
Children Writing About the Ocean
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Out of the mouths of babes....
Children Writing About the Ocean.
1) - This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles.
(Kelly, age 6)
2) - Oysters' balls are called pearls. (Jerry, age 6)
3) - If you are surrounded by ocean, you are an island. If you don't
have ocean all round you, you are incontinent. (, age 7)
4) - Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily
Richardson She's not my friend any more. (Kylie, age 6)
5) - A dolphin breaths through an asshole on the top of its head.
(Billy, age 8)
6) - My uncle goes out in his boat with 2 other men and a woman and
pots and comes back with crabs. (Millie, age 6)
7) - When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross
the ocean. Sometimes when the wind didn't blow the sailors would
whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would have been
better off eating beans. (William, age 7)
8) - Mermaids live in the ocean. I like mermaids. They are beautiful
and I like their shiny tails, but how on earth do mermaids get
pregnant? Like, really? (Helen, age 6)
9) - I'm not going to write about the ocean. My baby brother is a
always crying, my Dad keeps yelling at my Mom, and my big sister has
just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy, age 6)
10) - Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels
can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where
I think they have to plug themselves in to chargers.
(Christopher, age 7)
11) - When you go swimming in the ocean, it is very cold, and it
makes my willy small. (Kevin, age 6)
12) - Divers have to be safe when they go under the water.. Divers
can't go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky,
13) - On vacation my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she
was going very fast. She says she won't do it again because water
fired right up her big fat ass.. (Julie, age 7)
14) - The ocean is made up of water and fish. Why the fish don't
drown I don't know. (Bobby, age 6)
15) - My dad was a sailor on the ocean He knows all about the ocean.
What he doesn't know is why he quit being a sailor and married my mom.
(James, age 7)
If you didn't chuckle at one of these, you need to find a better sense of humor.
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